By Julia Matulionis |Opinions Editor|
“I work at a local food joint and really want to quit but the managers are super nice and I need the money for rent. What should I do? Signed, Employee of the Month.”
Dear Employee of the Month,
This is a common problem for employed students, but it really is a blessing in disguise. It’s a perfect opportunity for you to look around for something better! When looking for jobs its important to be confident and remember that they’re not only interviewing you, you’re interviewing them! Already being employed allows you the luxury of turning down jobs and waiting for that perfect fit. Plus, it sounds like your manager would give you a glowing recommendation and be happy that you’re looking to spread you wings. Just be sure to give them a heads up before you put them down as a reference. Good luck, and happy job hunting!
“Dear Ms. Gulia, boxers or briefs? Sincerely, Down Under Wonderer”
Dear Down Under,
Ah the classic question asked by men and women around the world. The answer really lies in how important your sperm count is to you. The fact is that the body is really good at keeping itself alive and regulating its functions. As all men, and most women know, the testicles regulate themselves by raising or lowering themselves from the body depending on your bodies temperature. They do this to keep your sperm count as high as possible in any given condition, i.e. if you’re really hot they lower away from your body to keep cooler or vice verse. Briefs don’t allow for this “free movement” so alas the winners in this circumstance would be boxers. Plus, your girlfriend can borrow a fresh pair for jammies when she stays over, bonus! Who knew I knew so much about balls?
“I’m a freshmen just starting college, what should I know about college? –The New Kid”
Hey New Kid,
Show up to every class, especially the first day. If you have to miss, try to look ahead in the syllabus to see which day would be the easiest to make up. Don’t ditch on the day of a midterm and then ask the teacher if you can make it up, they don’t like that. Be excited in class and try to have a positive attitude. Positivity is contagious and if you’re involved in lectures you will get the attention of your teacher and classmates (just don’t over do it, there’s a fine line). Be friendly with other people on campus. Push through any awkwardness and smile at a stranger, open a door for someone, make a lighthearted joke and follow up the next time with hi how are ya? I know these seem easy enough but if you feel the pressure to let up, or if you get a bad reaction, just keep on. Happiness can be the key to success if you let it. Congratulations on your ambition to further your education and we here at the chronicle wish you all the future success you can handle!
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CoyoteChronicle [email protected]mail.com
*Julia Matulionis is not a trained psychologist and all efforts for advice should be taken lightheartedly*