By Pauline Fontanaud |Staff Writer|
“One who does not burp or fart is bound to explode.”
This rough translation of a proverb by Chinese philosopher Lao-Tseu says it all.
Farts are a natural way for your body to release the gas it produces or absorbs.
They are the result of trapped air, which can have many sources. While we chew and drink, we swallow air that will need to be released.
But most of it is caused by fermentation.
Some food substances don’t get absorbed in our intestines and end up in the colon. There they are fermented by the bacteria living in our gut, creating gas.
“I never fart,” stated student Crystal Virgen.
FALSE. Everybody farts.
On average, a person produces about half a liter of farts a day, men and women alike.
Actually, if you were to fart continuously for six years and nine months, you would have produced gas with the equivalent energy of an atomic bomb, according to my calculations.
But then again, I’m not a scientist.
“I think farts happen when gas passes through and your butt hole vibrates, like a kazoo” stated Virgen.
TRUE. The fart sound is due to the rush of air making your rectum vibrate.
Is that not lovely? So the degree of noise depends on the amount of pressure behind the gas.
“Beans have never made me fart, maybe it’s because I’m Mexican and I’m immune,” stated student Erik Cervantez.
While beans can make you produce gas, they aren’t necessarily the biggest culprit. In fact, everyone reacts to certain foods differently and have their own personal gas maker.
That being said, there are certain types of food that are more prone to cause flatulence. The list is longer than you’d think.
Grains: whole wheat and brown rice, in particular.
Vegetables: most notably asparagus, cabbage, broccoli, Brussels sprouts, carrots, cauliflower, celery, cucumbers, kale, onions, radishes, and tomatoes.
Legumes: especially beans, lentils, peanuts, and peas.
Fruits: particularly apples, apricots, bananas, grapes, melons, peaches, pears, plums, and prunes.
Sugars: including those commonly used in energy bars, sugar-free candies, soda and other processed foods.
The key to avoid an overproduction of gas is to identify which food doesn’t agree with you and consume it in moderation.
What about the smell? Farts are mainly composed of nitrogen, hydrogen, and carbon dioxide.
But sulfur is what makes your farts stink.
Sulfur only represents about one percent of your fart’s composition. So, the more sulfur-rich your food–like eggs and cheese—the more your fragrance will hang heavily within the room.
We’ve asked our Coyotes about farting etiquette. We loved their responses.
“I try not to fart in public. It’s embarrassing, but also because I don’t want to offend anyone with my smell,” stated Cervantez.
“Our bodies are beautiful and they smell sometimes. But, yeah, say excuse me. We’re not animals,” stated student David Miranda.
You’re going to fart until you die, and even afterwards.
The human body keeps on releasing gas up to three hours after death.
This results in both burping and farting noises—creepy.