Coyote Chronicle’s favorite Michael Scott moments

By Matthew Bramlett |Assistant A&E Editor|

Last Thursday, April 28 , Steve Carell  and his character Michael Scott bid farewell to seven years of being the manager of Dunder-Mifflin Paper Supply Company in Scranton, PA. For many, it is the end of an era – the final awkward comment during seven years of uncomfortably hilarious situations. Michael has always been the source of memorable quotations, so here’s ten of them to commemorate the end of the most popular office manager in America.

10. “If you are lying to me, right now, Pam, your baby is going to come out a liar. That’s how it works. They inherit things through the breast milk.”
9. “You don’t call retarded people retards. It’s bad taste. You call your friends retards when they’re acting retarded.”
8. “(after sipping wine) That is sort of an oaky afterbirth.”
7. “Would you mind if I listened to my book on tape? I’m kind of a bookworm. It is a novelization of the movie Precious, based on the book Push by Sapphire.”
6. “I’m not afraid of corporate. But you know what I am afraid of? Gettin’ a boner.”
5. “Webster’s Dictionary defines ‘wedding’ as ‘the fusing of two metals with a hot torch.’ Well you know something? I think you guys are two medals. Gold medals.”
4. “Toby is in HR, which technically means he works for corporate, so he’s really not a part of our family. Also, he’s divorced, so he’s really not a part of his family.”
3. “Alright everybody in the conference room! I don’t care if you are gay, or straight, or a lesbian, or overweight! Just get in here, right now!”
2. “Guess what? I have flaws. What are they? Oh I don’t know, I sing in the shower? Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. Occasionally I’ll hit somebody with my car. So sue me — no, don’t sue me. That is opposite the point I’m trying to make.”
1. “Between the sheets, we were like Jordan and Pippen.”

 

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