By Emilie Chacon |Staff Writer|
It is not always easy for a relationship to survive the distance, but with some tips, couples can learn how to deal with it.
I am another exchange student from the cold Canada — Montreal to be more precise. Some of us had to make not only the decision to do the exchange program itself, but also leave a boyfriend or a girlfriend behind, which is the case for me.
I have a boyfriend who lives in Montreal at this time. It means that we are separate by 4,500 kilometers, which is approximately 2,796 miles, and live in a time difference of three hours.
Can a couple survive with such distance? Some say yes, some say no, but you have to consider some criteria according to some tips I have learned before, and from my own experience obviously.
At first, the couple won’t survive for a long time if one or both don’t trust each other. It sounds cliché, but trust is everything and if you don’t your relationship won’t survive, or worse, it will transform your journey into a nightmare and you won’t be able to enjoy it as much as you would.
Before leaving, it is really important to talk about your expectations and to see what is important for both of you to respect your boundaries.
Communication is also crucial to help the relationship stay strong.
With all the technology today, it is not that hard to communicate with the loved one. Skype, Facebook, Twitter, Facetime and other applications allow you to communicate by chat, voice and video with the people as far as they are.
I can tell that it is easier said than done. I knew all those tips, but I can tell now that it is not simple to apply them every single day of your journey.
For us, it was not that easy in the very beginning. We left each other at the airport like in those cheesy movies that I don’t like with the promise to talk to each other as often as possible.
In the beginning, we communicated every night at the same time. But as the journey progressed, the less we communicated. Our busy life, the new friends and the time difference did not help us.
Luckily, my birthday was around the middle of my journey here, and I had the chance to see him on a short trip. It was really nice, but also a bit weird to share my new American lifestyle, my new friends and my new habits with him.
We continued to talk on Skype, but I would be lying if I told you that nothing had changed. Those experiences change you forever and you are not evolving with the person you usually do.
Does it mean I don’t love my boyfriend anymore? Absolutely not, but I feel he can’t understand what I am experiencing here because he never and would never do an exchange program like I did.
Of course, this program is not the only situation where you are far from your lover. You may have to move out for work or other personal reasons, but the key is to stay the same: trust and communication.
Distance may end your relationship, but it can also improve it. You have to give it a try and you will see if it changes when you get back home.